1993- a senior in high school experiencing pain and racism like never before

The following is a video of me rapping when I was a senior in high school. The school was Lancaster Mennonite High School, a school where I have great memories. However, some miserable guys there did not like the fact that I was a die hard urbanite using rap as means of praising God and communicating His word. Their god was created in their image–white and also racist. I share this video made by a friend, who kept it all these years, to demonstrate how the rap was birthed out of pain and hope. Pain because there were people who hated me just because I thought different, looked different, and was different. It was a painful time because on one hand the few Latinos and African Americans at the school recruited from the inner city thought I was holier than thou because I was vocal about my faith and called all Christians to the standard of Christ likeness. On the other hand I was despised by a few white people who hated my culture, my land, and my ethnicity. My time there was lonely and painful yet God used that time to mold me into the man I am today.

In addition to the drama I was facing at the school, not just from students but also from some of the administration, my Dad was struggling with crack addiction, the home I grew up in turned into a crack house, and my Mother fled to Florida with my two little sisters. Moreover, my oldest sister was running the streets also trying to survive. Two years into my new life in Christ and what I just described was my reality.

However, as I said, looking back, I applaud my God for using those painful days to re-create me into a man who was self-conscious of who he was as a follower of Christ. Thus, among the pain there was hope. There were key people in my life that God used to make sure that although I was walking through fire, I was not going to get burned, although the waves were crashing in, I was not going to drown. While I was at Lancaster Mennonite High School, Duce, a.k.a. the Ambassador, was at Lancaster Bible College. I spent lots of weekends with him, being mentored as he modeled faithfulness to the person of Christ. He even came to the school to hang out with me letting people know that God had more than just one ambassador for His glory. My spiritual family, “Da Millers” went above and beyond encouraging me and fighting for me. My friend Ronald Tinsley was an extraordinary mentor telling me things that I really did not want to hear but that I had to hear. Many more names can be mentioned during these trying times who were instrumental in making sure that while going through the fire, I was not going to be consumed.

On that note, enjoy the following video depicting a younger man prior to my days as a Cross Movement member. The year was 1993.